As most of you know, I’ve been carrying around a secret for some time now and it has truly been eating away at me and I have wanted to tell the world for awhile now and now I finally have the go ahead to do so, SO HERE I GO! As of today I am 8 weeks 4 days pregnant. If you’ve ever heard me talk about my take on parenting you’d know that I’ve always wanted to have children, and for quite some time, I was told that I’d be unable to conceive. Benny and I had never really taken the precautions to prevent a pregnancy, so this was no accident. But it definitely wasn’t something we had planned on doing NOW. But because of the prior uncertainty to if I could ever get pregnant when I read the positive test I knew that now is the time to embrace the huge change that is about to happen to both of us. I haven’t touched a cigarette in over a month and I’ve been struggling with morning sickness and nausea for quite some time now. For now, the porn is on hold. And after speaking with Joanna she said she’d be stoked to shoot me as a milf, after I recuperate and get sexy after the baby is born. That’s why I’m not in Massachusetts for filming with Bella or the ROP barbecue which I had planned to suspend at. No more caffeine, drinking, smoking, sushi, and fun anymore but in 7 months, Benny will be a dad, and I’ll be what I always wanted to be. A mom. :D
I’ve told my mom and dad, they’re both ecstatic and my mom was sending me crib ideas since the day I told her. Benny’s mom, and sister both know and they’re happier than ever as well! Unfortunately, telling some of my close friends didn’t strike the reaction I’d hoped for. Because while Benny and I know that we’re ready, our friends aren’t ready for us to take that sort of step into adulthood it seems. Fortunately I was lucky enough for this to happen with someone who would stick with me through the hardships of pregnancy and being a parent, and we are ready to completely grow up and take this on, together.
I’m already deeply in love with the 3/4 of an inch little mutant inside of me, and I can’t wait to find out the gender. :)
So there you have it folks, I’m gonna be a mommy :D
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